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So good to see you. We survived the garden gnome attack. I was pretty impressed with those moves of yours. Wearing purple didn’t help. But you surprised me. Where did you learn those moves? It was hilarious. No, not you. The way they scampered. You and me against hundreds of gnomes. I bet Chuck was surprised.

Hey, thanks for saving my life.

You’re my best friend.

I see you blushing.

Okay, I’ll shut up now. *Big hug*

Oosters is with us today and feeling a little experimental – and I’m liking it. Here’s a film review and a bit more on Sylvester Stallone’s film career.

Enjoy and I’ll see you soon.

THE EXPENDABLES ****4 Stars

Directed by Sylvester Stallone
Starring Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Randy Couture, Steve Austin, Terry Crews, Mickey Rourke and Bruce Willis

~ Film and actor reviewed by Oosters ~

Sylvester Stallone’s recent career resurgence has been something of a surprise. After a string of awful, deserved box office failures (his ill-advised remake of Get Carter followed by the expensive flop Driven saw both D-Tox and Avenging Angelo go to straight to DVD in the UK, and there was also the possible career nadir of playing the villain in Spy Kids 3), he presumably sat down and thought about what was going wrong, coming to the conclusion that he had strayed too far from what made him popular in the first place.

As interesting and laudable as his efforts to stretch himself may have been (as in the flawed but interesting Cop Land for example), people don’t really want to pay to see Stallone tortured by inner demons – they would rather see him torture some foreigner or a terrorist perhaps.

Rather than wrestling with inner turmoil, audiences are more keen to see him wrestle other similarly muscular men, followed by a violent demise and an even more wince-inducing quip. So he did what all steroid-infuse men approaching pensioner age do – went back to his roots.

The only films Stallone made that ever saw any kind of critical respect were the original iterations of Rocky and Rambo (the latter in fact called First Blood but now referred to by most as Rambo 1 for reasons of clarity that will soon become perfectly understandable).

Rocky in fact was his breakout hit, in which he not only starred but wrote the screenplay (and was even Oscar-nominated for both). It has stood the test of time very well, a spirited and oddly moving underdog tale that has the strength of being far more interesting than any of its increasingly inferior sequels by virtue of the fact that Rocky loses at the end.

The franchise had been dead and buried for sixteen years (after the dreadful nail in the coffin that was Rocky V, easily the worst in the series) when he elected to return to the role that had served him so well with Rocky Balboa.

With Stallone behind the camera himself, much to most people’s surprise it was a success, not only with critics who warmed to the mature and poignant tone he opted to use but with audiences, who seemed to have reserves of affection for the character.

While not quite as accomplished as the original, it’s easily better than any of the other sequels and is a fitting finale – he loses at the end again, bringing things to a satisfying full circle.

Deciding to attempt the same trick with a different character, he tried his hand at another Rambo film next (simply titled “Rambo”, itself the title to the sequel to First Blood, which can be differentiated by the subtitle “First Blood Part II”, although that doesn’t explain the third film being called “Rambo III” – you know what, fuck it, let’s just call them Rambo 1-4 for crying out loud).

Although never as critically respected as Mr Balboa, John Rambo was an interesting enough character in the original film, and had experienced a similar cinematic life with a decent original, each sequel being less interesting than its predecessor, and culminating in a final instalment so mind-blowingly stupid it effectively killed the franchise (Rambo III is so bad it’s hard to watch it now and not view it as some sort of parody).

While Rambo 4 may not have enjoyed the critical respect of Rocky Balboa (in fairness, as a series it was never well-received in that quarter, even First Blood – sorry, Rambo 1 – was given short shrift), and it wasn’t as much of a commercial success (still turned a tidy profit though), it’s a pretty impressive piece of lunk-headed entertainment, utterly stupid and unsubtle but a fun throwback to the sort of stuff Stallone used to churn out on a regular basis in his heyday.

Critics may scoff and its artistic merit might be debatable, but it’s in the same ballpark as Demolition Man, Cliffhanger and Rockys 2, 3 and 4 – testosterone-fuelled nonsense that only the churlish would fail to get some entertainment from.

It is to that arena he has returned with The Expendables, a macho men-on-a-mission movie with an all-star cast of action film actors, and it suffers from all the same flaws critics have been complaining about throughout Stallone’s career. It’s dumb, simplistically-plotted, low on character development and high on explosions.

But it’s fun, easy to watch and instantly forgettable.

It’s Stallone, back doing what he does best, while his no-doubt aching biceps can still manage it – making us put Citizen Kane aside for a while, and indulge ourselves in the heady likes of Assassins, Lock Up and Tango & Cash.

Have you seen the film?

What did you think of it?

Leave a comment. It’s good to know.

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Splice: Film Review

Toy Story 2 – Film Review

Inception – Film Review

Predators – Film Review

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse – Film Review

Whatever Works – Film Review

Shrek Forever After – Film Review

“People who soar, are those who refuse to sit back and wish things would change.”

Charles R. Swindoll – Author and Pastor

CURRENT STATUS: Reminder, Motivator and Review Meeting (Read on if you want to join me in my Corporation of One meeting)

What l have learnt:

• Sometimes it’s good to stop and have a good old daydream.

What I have done:

• Got to learn lines for a shoot so nothing much on the writing front.
  

WORD COUNT: Night Walker 159,000 words. Finished. Leaving to marinate.